The Witch of the Chemical Marsh tasked me with arranging the seating chart for the dinner party and, inevitably, there is potential for unwanted reactivity. I have almost everything arranged such that enemies are not near enough to each other to go at throats, overenthusiastic friends won't take up a table's entire conversation, and other such problems won't occur. But alas, my luck runs out. The seating at table seven is proving difficult. There are two seats to fill, between the Duke's Muckrake and the Electric Marchioness, and across from the Royal Lens-Grinder and the Bleak Knight.
Next to the Muckrake, perhaps {cycling link for: "left", choices: ["the Surgeon-Admiral", "Lady Sunbreaker", "the Silvertongue Princeling", "the Spiderling Witch"]}.
Next to the Marchioness, perhaps {cycling link for: "right", choices: ["the Wartime Advisor", "the Iron Canoness", "the Saint of Forgetting", "the Falconry Prodigy"]}.
[[Calculate reaction]]Putting {left} next to {right}. What problems might arise?
[if left === "the Surgeon-Admiral" && right == "the Wartime Advisor"]
With no peacetime hobbies other than scandalmongering, I'm sure the Duke's Muckrake will have a field day with these two.
[if left === "Lady Sunbreaker" && right == "the Iron Canoness"]
They'll get along like several houses and municipal buildings on fire.
[if left === "the Silvertongue Princeling" && right == "the Saint of Forgetting"]
Hm. They might cancel each other out. Strike a balance between everyone at the table losing a few hours and being seduced into some new trade scheme.
[if left === "the Spiderling Witch" && right == "the Falconry Prodigy"]
And how many birds has he lost to her? How often has she told him what "good sport" he offers?
[continue]
> [[Perhaps otherwise->Poor Planning]]
> [[Yes, that]]scandalous: left === "the Surgeon-Admiral" && right == "the Wartime Advisor"
destructive: left === "Lady Sunbreaker" && right == "the Iron Canoness"
forgettable: left === "the Silvertongue Princeling" && right == "the Saint of Forgetting"
unhappy: left === "the Spiderling Witch" && right == "the Falconry Prodigy"
--
The dinner party goes off broadly successfully.
[if scandalous]
The papers tomorrow will have all variety of novel material, some of it even true.
[if destructive]
{left} and {right} did approach my mistress with a request for a variety of combustible reagents, so one can only assume what novel armament they're cooking up.
[if forgettable]
I remember some amount of conversation from table seven, but I don't recall what on.
[if unhappy]
The Prodigy was reported missing a few days later, though. Very odd.
[if !scandalous && !destructive && !forgettable && !unhappy]
I am able to rest confident in a successful job done.
[continue]
{restart link, label: "There's always next party, of course!"}